Hii ...
It was only mild for a while but for the last 4 months has become so severe I sometimes struggle to lift my arms. Words can't describe how sad I feel all of the time. Every second of the day feels like an hour and I just cry over and over because of the pain I'm in. I think about suicide a lot but have not planned anything. It's more of a strange urge - if a truck or bus is coming down the road my brain says 'just quickly throw your head under the wheels and it'll all be over.' But I still have a logical part of my mind that knows it's a bad idea (and also extremely scary).
I wonder if this mind. And the reason for that is, instead of feeling like I have a veil of sadness over me, it feels like a veil of happiness. misery, selfish and cold.
It seems like all the healthy people are the ones who are tricked by a veil in thinking. They are all distracted by things that just are not important.
Now that I feel this way, I can not imagine ever believing in life again. Is my mind broken forever?
Thanks!
I did not find the right solution from the Internet.
References: -https://patient.info/forums/discuss/has-depression-broken-my-mind-permanently--618216
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